Head In My Bag-In-Box

Sometimes, when a girl tries to save that little extra money by traveling with Ryanair and therefore can't take her handbag with her because of the bagage restrictions, a girl is stupid.

But hey, who needs intelligence anyway? Rose wine and imagination, thats what you really want.

Maybe not something that I'll do every weekend, but you know, think it came out pretty well considering. The extra silver lining of the evening was getting ID'd at debaser. I think, I think that means I look young and pretty. Yeah.

Dear Satan

I'm not sure but I think this is your doing? If not, then I do apologize beforehand, I rather just go straight to you since I don’t reeeeeally get along with the Other guy. Me being an atheist an all, you understand I'm sure.

So, I'm pretty new to all this and I'm uncertain to how it works. I mean I took religion in school (even got a pretty good grade, not to brag or anything) and I'm just guessing here but you seem to be the opposite of "Him". So I know I haven’t always been good and I suppose that’s the kind of thing you'd approve of? Anyway. This, the unfortunate "deed" that happened yesterday, is it punishment? And what for in that case? Haven't I been bad enough for your taste? Maybe things are just working out a bit too well for me? It just occurred to me that this might even be some sort of reward according to your standards. Like, when your cat brings you a dead, headless mouse to your bedside. Have I been too bad perhaps? I.. I just don't understand.

Anyways, just to let you know I'm not very happy about this. And I mean that as in a not good-not happy way. Uhm, how should I explain this, kinda like when something good and nice happens to you? You understand? I would be terribly grateful if you'd just undo this and give me my old hair colour back. I can even do some really bad stuff, just to make you happy? Like... hmmm... oh, oh! I can sin! I can eat loads of ice cream! Like in Gluttony, right? I might even go so far as to do some Greed and Sloth. But pleeeeeease, pretty pretty please with a cherry on the top just remove this emo-Melon hair colour will you?

Thanks in advance

ps. I really hope you understand, its just not "me". Besides, even you should know that its kindof not the 90's anymore. Black is, like, so out.

Maddy

tap dance tap dance tap dance (lap dance?)

Today, my dear readers, there are no Emo Melons in sight. No today is a happy day. (A Watermelon Night!?) I'm thrilled, delighted, enthralled, intoxicated, and excited - all at once! And why is that, you ask?

I'll tell you why. Because around this time tomorrow I'll be suffering through the ninth circle of hell that is the Ryanair flight to STOCKHOLM. yes. STOCKHOLM! Well, its Skavsta really, but you know. Ryanair calls it Stockholm so right now so do I.

And it gets better. Not only am I going home, this time I'm staying for... sit down and be prepared for the shock... 10 DAYS! TEN. DAYS. Its holiday good people, holiday. Simestoooor!

Be. Jealous.

Something Phenomenal

So. I looked through the pictures from this weekend and realized some of a certain someone were just too good to deserve the fate of fading in to the vast ocean of meaningless heads in bags. Yes, they deserve their own post. So here he is. Ladies and gents, I hereby present to you the great, amazing, phenomenal, glorious, everyothergoodsuperlativethereis- STEPHEN BROADLEY!

Oh yes, sir. I can boogie.

As last week was nearing its end I felt a bit tired. Working a couple extra hours on the evenings, my quick but intense weekend trip to Stockholm and just a general slight stress have deprived me of sleep and peace of mind. I was certain this weekend would be one of those calm, relaxed weekends. The ones where you do "nice" things. And save money. And rest. The kind of weekend I just never have.

On Friday afternoon, all it took was a chat with Rob, a quick listen to Rex The Dog, a stop by Tescos to purchase a bottle of Captain Morgan and there I was. The Legion. Prancing around like some sort of epileptic animal in my shiny silver boots. Literally forcing shots of Sambucca down my poor friends throats.

Yes, and not to mention the forcing of my bag on to random people's heads. I noticed this time that I dont even bother explaining anymore. I used to have this whole repertoire. Yes, I used to ask!

I used to.

I hang out with this person. Yes, I do. I admit to this simply because I hope it will explain some of my own perhaps not entirely normal behaviour. Whatever's wrong with him I think, I think its contagious.

its FRIDAY and the Party Cat says...

Emo Melon day

Yeah I'm having one of those today. Can’t really say it’s a bad day, it’s just.... not good? I’ve been pretty productive but still can’t shake the feeling I’m behind schedule. Which I'm not! But you know. The haunting stress in the back of my mind. I think it will turn out to be a good day but right now I find the word "fuck" perhaps a bit too accurate to describe almost everything. Fucking emails with lolcats. Fucking weather. Fucking contacts are hurting because of the fucking aircon. You see? I could just go on for hours.

I think my main problem right now is time. So I'm 25, young and all that jazz, I know. But fuck (yeah there I go again) there's so much to do! There's like 50 different professions I'd like to try. I got a lovely family that I don’t see enough of. I got too many friends I love and don’t have time to appreciate the way they deserve. I have a great life in Stockholm and another one here in the UK, but somehow rather than enjoying the benefit of two amazing lives I always end up feeling torn.

So, yeah Emo Melon. I should really be grateful for all of these things I right now so selfishly complain about. At least I know it. Rant rant rant. I'm gonna go back to my classical music and reading about Mesopotamia as it’s my new lunch-hobby.

Here you go fellow emo melons. Some cheer-me-up communicator conversations about the chinese "Haw flakes" that SOMEONE brought in to work.

And THEN humanity decided to create...

...this!?

"8 Ultra Rare Magical Pink Puppies to Collect"?

Really?

No. We certainly don't deserve to prevail as a race.

Yeah so notice Satan, just above the green slime dog from hell.